AUDITIONS FULL OF DESPERATION

Give me the South. The auditions Wednesday were filled with desperation, begging, a willingness to do anything (it was L.A., after all). It made me miss Birmingham's politeness Tuesday. What's worse, the powers that be allowed Martik "The Panther" Manoukian to kick the night off with his preening. I smell another K-Fed. Auditions wrap up in the San Antonio next week.

-- Most likely to make the final 24: Brandon Rogers, who sang Always on My Mind. Duh. He's a professional back-up singer who toured with Christina Aguilera.

-- Cowellism of the night: "You sounded like Cher after she'd been to the dentist."

-- Put down the crack pipe: The judges bounced two good singers Tuesday, but Wednesday, Simon drooled over Alaina Alexander's lackluster Feelin' Good. One day, we'll find that the real powers behind the show are Voldemort, Lord Vader and Col. Saito.

-- Admit it, you cried: Seeing Sherman Pope, 64, sing You Belong to Me in memory of his recently departed sweetie.

-- Local angle: WAWS TV-30 reported after the show that Douglas Anderson School of the Arts grad Jason Andino got through to Hollywood. A fan recap on the official Idol site said he was the gondolier seen singing Stand By Me in the auditions last year but didn't make that cut.